nowhere within the emotional feelings
network of sites is any opportunity for me to make any profit from any of the 28 + sites within
this network. this network of sites has been put together as a personal mission to help others by informing those who need
information concerning mental health, eating disorders, lifestyle factors, and every other topic listed within.
all underlined link words open up a new window instead of changing your present one, taking you to another site within the emotional feelings network of sites - or to another site
referencing the underlined link word!
Welcome to more emotional feelings website!
If you're trying
to find personal growth, an avenue to get to know yourself
from something... you'll find that there are many "connections
" along your journey.
It's all the "connections" that you find
, that cause a spark to be ignited within you that will carry you along when the going gets tougher.
It's very important
that you visit the page: keeping in touch!
For a life changing listen
- click here
- it's truly life changing and something we all need to listen
to. It does take some time to listen to Randy Pausch's Last Lecture, but you won't regret it.
You can help yourself by helping others.
You might not think
so; but it's true. Find something you can do to help some worthy
causes. "Keeping in Touch"
will show you some important
causes that need
Your dictionary definition of:
||feeling fear; filled with apprehension: afraid
to go. |
||feeling regret, unhappiness, or the like: I'm
afraid we can't go on Monday. |
feeling reluctance, unwillingness, distaste, or the like: He seemed afraid to show his own children a little kindness.
5 years ago
I was diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder
& I was also experiencing an eating disorder
that no one knew anything about; night eating
Why would someone spend
1000's of hours designing & keeping up these websites to offer free information to others?
I have to reply - "You're absolutely right! It
does take many, many hours each day to work on these sites. I'm a mother, a wife & an individual who has tons of
personal work to do as well as the usual family responsibilities!
How would I find the time? I knew that if I made the
commitment to myself to keep up these sites... I would HAVE to do it....
Why do I do it? I use the opportunity to combine
my own recovery - personal growth journey with an important concept that I've made a commitment to:
"Helping yourself thru helping others..."
I was so excited when after years of searching for the answer to my everyday question, "What's
wrong with me?" that I felt determined to show others that if you don't quit & you know the path to take, you can find your answers as well!
My immediate concern
at that time was "mental health
." While I didn't know what was wrong with me, I did have one medical specialist tell me that my physical pain was due to
a "mental problem."
I didn't quite understand
it all, I was wallowing in many different symptoms of mental illness like panic attacks, severe anxiety & finally
my eating disorder symptoms of waking up numerous times in the night to eat.
Just as you may have seen recently
on either public service television commercials
or in your doctor's office waiting room; mental illness can manifest itself in physical symptoms that include many sources
of discomfort. I was also experiencing the symptoms of "irritable bowel syndrome," that had started early on in my life. So
I'll start with the mental health site that now exists within the network:
I've reached a point
in my own personal recovery
& growth journey that I believe
I can describe accurately most of the emotions
within the emotional feelings network of sites
without using any information from anyone
the ruination of the "extremely emotional
site - I had to stop & ask myself - remembering to be aware
of what's happening in my present moment
"Why did this happen to me?" (the unreasonable ruin of my site, of
Choosing to seek a positive
return for a negative
energy passing my way - what would the positive
ramifications be of having to go through every single page of a network of 28+ sites to delete the links to my ruined site?
now that I think
of it... I've asked myself that question quite a few times before... "Why did this happen to me?"
& I searched & searched for an answer, wasting time & positive
energy on something very simple... Life is what's happening. Just look to find the positive
about it instead of the negative
This is what I am looking for now
in all aspects of my life. I'm looking for the "positive
" reasons things happen. I remember what I've learned from my past to be prepared to have to confront negativities
with my re-gained "power
" on my side now instead of the enemy; but I choose now to look upon the face of countenance instead of upheaval.
After pondering a few days
on this subject, while going through every page
of the emotional feelings site
- here - to unlink all the emotion
" thru the end of the alphabet - I realized something magnificent.
"This is my opportunity to take the time to check ALL linked words to be
sure they're being directed to the correct places. This is my opportunity to re-check spelling & grammar. This is my opportunity
to try to express in my own words - the most meaningful knowledge I've recently acquired!
I'll write what I've learned
about the whole cake, almost 6 years of growth - not
just reveal a the first piece of the cake! - I still offer other author's works to explain situational inferences
I'll try to the best of my ability
to explain the importance
of every emotion
. I'm honored
you chose the emotional feelings network of sites
is coming along.
it's the replacement site for extremely emotional!
thanks for your continued patience with me as it takes so long to re-establish all the underlined link words
as well as building a new site!
Why Men Are Afraid of Commitment (And How To Help) By Dr Brenda Shoshanna
Freedom means different things for different men. For some, the main joy of relationships is challenge. They happily pursue a woman
as long as they don't have her, but once they do, they start feeling trapped. These men feel as if excitement & new possibilities
are now cut off.
Once commitment is in the picture these men feel as though they're trapped & imprisoned. They often say that once a woman has
him, he’ll be putty in her hands. In the end he feels he will lose his sense of masculinity. For them it’s all
a power game. The one who's strong is the one who needs less. The power is in not needing.
men need to be in control to feel their power. It's no wonder that men like these cannot stay with one woman long. Sooner or later feelings of dependency
start to grow. At this point, these men take to the hills. No matter how strong they think they are, their loneliness &
frustration only intensify each time they run.
Other men start to feel used when
time comes for commitment. Many women feel as though they need a man to make a commitment in order to feel secure. But when a man senses this, it can make him feel like an object, as if he's being used for the woman's
No man wants to feel as if he's being used. As soon as he does, he's going
to leave. Feeling loved is different from feeling used. When a woman can give a man freedom, when she has a full, independent
life of her own, it can take his fear of being used away.
Deep within all men want
to feel loved in relationships. They want to stay & experience being valued & valuing another as well. Once their
fears & patterns of running away are understood, they can be handled & everyone can win. To begin, we must see where
these patterns come from & what they're protecting the man from.
pattern develops at an early age. At one point in a young man's development the father becomes his opponent, his rival for
the mother's love. When the boy has a healthy maturation, he is able to relinquish his mother & overcome his rivalry with
his father. At this point, his father becomes his friend, he identifies with him & is later able to go forward & attain
a love of his own.
Some men don't overcome the rivalry with the father. They never
grow to feel they can have a woman of their own. And, they act out this pattern over & over in all kinds of relationships.
They may give themselves an unconscious message that love is dangerous, perhaps forbidden. Or, they tell themselves the love
object, (mother), ultimately belongs to another, (to father). No matter how much I want her, they think, I can never have
the woman of my dreams for myself.
Or, if I do have her, I am taking her away from someone else.
These men often find that they're unable to be successful competing
with other men; they're convinced other men will easily win the woman they desire. For them, some other man has more to offer,
just as they believed their father did. This is a clear replay of childhood, when they felt they could never measure up to
Unless this dynamic is worked through a man's ongoing relationship
with women will, sooner or later, be troubled.
Sometimes it's the relationship with the mother, not father, that causes
a man to fear & run from love. In other cases, some mothers hold onto their sons emotionally & refuse to let go. Other
mothers withhold the love their sons need.
Some are rejecting or overpowering with her son. When this happens
the woman becomes the opponent for the man.
Men who suffer from this situation run from women continually, seeing
love as a trap, a place where they'll never get their needs met. Many men are much more fragile than they seem. Harsh words
from a woman they are dating can cut very deep.
A woman in relationship with a man
like this would do well to encourage him to express his feelings. She should listen quietly & be careful about criticizing
him. When she does express her needs & feeling, it's important to do it carefully, in a non-critical manner, making sure
he is also aware of how much she values him.
Ultimately, for a man to be healthy
romantically, he must work out unfinished business. Once he does he will develop a basic confidence in himself & be able
to move forward & find a loving, suitable woman of his own. Commitment is an organic process that takes time. It usually happens in small steps & is the natural progression of the heart.
Touchstones To Remember
(How To Deal With Men Who Are Afraid Of
- Listen carefully to what he tells you. Don’t criticize.
- Don't think your love will change him or make him want you more. He wants you as much as he can right
- The less pressure, guilt & obligation in this relationship, the better. The busier you are, the more self
fulfilled, the better the chances for this relationship to continue.
Look at your pictures & expectations in relationships. Understand why you feel trapped in relationships & always need
a way out. What or who is it you're really running from?
- Try to form a relationship where you can give yourself the
emotional freedom to be who you are. Many men feel they constantly have to perform for the woman & therefore don't want
to stay for too long. Allow yourself to be true to yourself in the relationship. Say no when you want to. Then you can say
- Find women who are more accepting. Ask them in advance about what they need to feel good in a relationship.
If they're too possessive, go on to someone else.
Are You Afraid to Get Well?
By Susan Peabody
I believe that to get well we have to face our fear. In 1982, when a friend suggested I go to a 12-Step
program, I blurted out, “I can’t, I’m afraid they might cure me.” Little did I realize what I was
saying about myself.
It was years before I was able to face the fear I expressed to my friend that day, but the time
finally came. I was discussing my hesitancy about going to a 12-Step program with my therapist, when he suddenly asked me,
“What holds you back from getting well? What do you think the block is?” Without thinking, I simply admitted that
recovery was unfamiliar. It was a mystery that lay beyond a closed door and I had no peep hole. That mystery felt like a beast
ready to devour me if I opened the door. “What if getting better is worse than being sick?” I said to him. “It
can happen. Besides, I think I have bonded to my vision of myself as a victim. I prefer self-pity to self-esteem” My
therapist looked at me in surprise, but before he could say anything I left. I really didn’t want to talk about this
because it made me feel ashamed.
Later, when I was alone, I began to think about what I had revealed to my therapist
about my fear of getting well and my victim mentality. Moments later, for no explainable reason, I got down on my knees and
prayed for the willingness, courage, and guidance to change. I said out loud, “God help me! I want to get well!”
Then I went to an 12-StepA.A. meeting.
My first meeting was amazing. I sat in the back of the room, trying not to be
seen, crying my eyes out. The speaker was talking about himself and yet he seemed to be talking about me. Most of all, I felt
as if I had come home, without understanding why.
Home, as it turned out, was the right word for what I was feeling.
The 12-Step program I belong to has become my second home, and it is not just a physical place. Metaphorically, it is that
place in my heart where my soul resided before the trauma of my childhood and the years of ensuing addiction. It is where
I am free and unencumbered by my fears and illusions. Literally, it is the meetings I attend almost every day. Most of all,
recovery is what was behind that door I was so afraid of where my Higher Power teaches me everything I need to know about
getting better and reaching my full potential as a human being.
What have I learned from all this? God is not going
to heal us without our permission. We must say yes to recovery. We must get past our reservations about being “happy,
joyous and free” (as strange as that sounds). We must come home.